Thank God Tomorrow is Friday

Today was a little tough at work. Tomorrow will be tougher, but then the weekend will come. There's a dog in my apartment. My roommate's Dad apparently needed him to dog sit a french poodle for the weekend. I'm going to spend the next 4 days trying to teach this regal beast to grab a beer from the fridge and bring it to me.

So, in other news, meet this guy....


He apparently posted a classified of himself on the NYC Craigslist site with these words, "Mr. Right Iz Here Waitin on U." He then included a bunch of photos, one of which is above. This guy apparently thought the 4 million women in the Naked City would swoon. The site Gawker found it and shared it with the peoples. He then called the Gawker offices to complain that those "photos was mines." Enter Fark.

For those that have never been to Fark.com, it's basically a site that has odd news stories on the left of the page, with a funny caption, and then the comments. The comments are generally some of the funniest you will ever see. Feel free to peruse the site above, but I've linked the comments about this story here. Enjoy.

This speaks to the Harlem in me

If you're from NYC or know it well, these two guys do a good job breaking down the ubiquitous check cashing empire.

Favorite line: "What were you going to do with those 9 cents anyway?"

Hey there

I'm sure many of you have fallen asleep waiting for an update. Some of you perhaps were concerned I was kidnapped by radical Mormons, while others might have thought I joined Erik Estrada in Arkansas.

The actual sequence of events was:
30th Reunion of college a cappella group
FEMA conference in Emmitsburg, MD
Wedding for good friend in CT.

It was all a good time, though when someone asked what I thought of the FEMA week I remarked that old line about feeling like a mushroom. They kept us in the dark and fed us a lot of shit. But the good parts were had in the interaction between the states. A really nice bunch of people.

In my day or two at home between these activities I found out that my heart rate monitor arrived from Woot. This will allow me to maximize my workouts, or allow me to predict my impending death in a more accurate way. The set up looks like this:
Except for the fact mine has a watch with a readout for your heart rate and this guy is totally a sex offender. (Thanks Rowsport.com for the image.) So I went running and the idea is to stay in the target heart rate. So I hear the thing beeping for the whole 3 mile or so run and it's flashing. I think this means that I'm below my target heart rate so I push on harder.

It's important at this time to point out that I have mistaken the target heart rate for the maximum heart rate, so basically I'm willing my ventricles to explode. I come back and the watch tells me dutifully that I spent 28 minutes of the 30 minute run above my target, and the beeping is apparently an alarm to let you know to dial it down a notch. Good to know. I looked like I was being chased I'm sure. By slow zombies. I have lost close to 20 pounds in the past year though.

Hope everyone else had a nice weekend.

Irony thy name is family

So I come home today and I find an Amazon box. It wasn't my Heart Monitor I had ordered for running as that just shipped, so I knew it was either a mistake or a gift. Well, it was a gift either way. It was a gift. A book. From my Dad and step-mother, Susan. The book is called Walking on Eggshells: Navigating the Delicate Relationship between Adult Children and Parents. That's fine. Parents send their kids books all the time. The book apparently has gotten good reviews.

It was the note that they wrote in the text box that came written on the packing slip. (Clears throat)

Susan met Isay yesterday (the author) and thought she was so good that we are giving this to some of our friends who have real issues, but thought we could all learn something. Love, J&S

Okay, so it's obvious that this book was sent as a gift to more than just me. I don't know much about this whole family psychology thing, but something tells me that if you're sending a book like this to your adult children you probably don't want to tell them you're doing it because they have "real issues." But that's just me.

It did make for a good laugh. And yes, I'll read the book. Hope everyone's Wednesday is going swimmingly.

Huh

I just want to point out that if you google "Civil Servant" that this site is on the first page. The bottom, but still the first page.

Soon the ads will start and then I'm going to retire filthy rich. Or I'll just keep writing this so my family and 7 friends can find out what is going on in my life.

This game will be the death of me

So what do you do on a rainy weekend in Boston. Well, if you have Grand Theft Auto IV, you play it a lot. I'm from NYC as most know and that's the setting for the game. They spent a lot of time making it really realistic. I just got access to Manhattan in the game, so I've enjoyed exploring the old haunts. They even included Harlem Hospital, god bless their hearts. Here's actual game footage from a helicopter you can "borrow."

And when I wasn't doing that, I was reading The Power Broker, which is only 1344 pages. But a great read if you want to know more about Robert Moses. The guy did a lot, but really comes off as a complete prick.

Finally tonight I went to the grocery store, which means it's time for this weeks grocery oddity. You'll recall that last time it was the Kraft Bagelful, which is the toastable bagel that has cream cheese inside. I'd give that product a B. And today I chose for my dining pleasure...

Jimmy Dean's mini sausages wrapped in small blueberry pancakes. I originally wanted to go for the pancake wrapped sausage on a stick. Sort of a breakfast corn dog, but I thought I would have gotten funny looks from the girl buying steamed frozen veggies next to me. Not like the mini sausages are better for you. I will review those early this week.

It's like playing a Scorcese movie

So I may or may not have waited on line at midnight to buy Grand Theft Auto 4.

And I may or may not have played it until 3AM, leaving around 4 hours for sleep.

And if I didn't have a meeting tomorrow, I might have called in sick.

But make no mistake about this, it's the most beautiful and awesome game experience I've had. Wow.

I think there's something in my eye

So my step-mother passed along this incredible article about a woman teaching a terminally ill deaf child with Downs in Pittsburgh. And that woman happens to be married to my brother in Pittsburgh.

Nice job sister. Love you and incredibly proud of you.

There's some great photos of her with Sarah, the little girl here.

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On the Job: Student's illness changes teacher's lessons

By Allison M. Heinrichs
TRIBUNE-REVIEW
Monday, April 28, 2008

Buzz up!

Malkah Bird has taught mentally challenged children to tell time, use sign language and count money.

But when one of her students developed a deadly cancer, Bird began teaching her most difficult lesson.

"I never would have guessed at the beginning of the year that the big umbrella concept we're going to work on is what happens when your friend gets sick," said Bird, who teaches special education at the Western Pennsylvania School for the Deaf. "I've never taught this lesson before, so we're all learning together."

Bird, 29, is in her second year with the Edgewood school. It's a career path she never imagined she'd take

Shortly after graduating with a degree in geology from Smith College in western Massachusetts, Bird was accepted to Teach for America, a program that recruits high-scoring recent college graduates to teach in underprivileged areas.

She was sent to the Navajo Indian Reservation in New Mexico and, for two years, taught a class of mentally challenged teen boys whom other teachers had labeled "impossible."

Many of the children couldn't speak and would get frustrated because Bird didn't understand what they wanted. So she taught them -- and herself -- some sign language.

"A whole new world opened up," she said. "Suddenly they had this ability to communicate."

Inspired, Bird went to the University of Pittsburgh to earn a master's degree in deaf education and started teaching middle school at the Western Pennsylvania School for the Deaf.

Although most children at the school are as intelligent as any hearing child, Bird decided to continue teaching mentally challenged students.

"Everyone has a calling in life, and this is Malkah's," said Donald Mazreku, assistant principal in the middle school. "The students she works with have multiple disabilities and, where some may view that as a challenge, Malkah is a person who perceives it as an opportunity."

Bird's goal is to help the children become functioning members of society, teaching them to count money, tell time, make food and do laundry.

"Who's to say that what they have to contribute to society isn't just as important as what I contribute?" Bird said. "Every human deserves the opportunity to feel successful."

Sarah Richardson, 15, of Wilkins is one of Bird's students. A strong-willed girl who loves candy and the Disney princesses, Sarah was born with Down syndrome and diagnosed with autism four years ago.

"She's brilliant with any kind of matching or shapes," Bird said.

In February, Sarah was diagnosed with a rare cancer that caused her left thigh to swell to three times its normal size. She was admitted to Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh in Oakland.

"That day, when I told Malkah that Sarah had cancer, she came down here and was waiting for me in the emergency room," said Sarah's mother, Denise Richardson. "We call her Malkah-mom."

Because the cancer has spread to Sarah's lungs, doctors consider her terminally ill. Denise Richardson isn't sure her daughter will be alive for her 16th birthday May 29.

The school rearranged class schedules for Bird and fellow teacher Sally Wellman so they could spend a few hours every week tutoring Sarah. Even on days she isn't scheduled to teach, Bird visits Sarah, who is in hospice care at The Children's Institute in Squirrel Hill.

On a recent visit, Sarah tried to match shapes through a morphine haze and the distracting tickle of her strawberry-blond hair falling out when she suddenly scrunched up her face and started to cry.

Tears sprang to Denise Richardson's eyes as Bird stopped the lesson to cup Sarah's face in her hands and kiss her forehead.

"That is what's hardest for me," Denise Richardson said. "How do you watch your little girl in so much pain?"

To prepare Sarah's classmates for their friend's death, Bird and the other teachers explain daily that Sarah is very sick. Bird created a fundraiser called "Steps for Sarah" and her students have walked 100 miles and raised $2,000 to help Sarah's family.

"Just as with every other teacher that I have seen in that school, Malkah has a love for her students," said John Irwin, who is the father of Nathan, 15, one of Sarah's classmates. "It's exemplified in how she, and everyone at the school, has rallied around Sarah Richardson and her family."

Bird said there is value in teaching any child, even one with terminal cancer.

"In the beginning we continued teaching Sarah, I think, because we saw that she was bored," Bird said. "But now it's more. Just like anybody, if you have a reason to fight, you fight."