And now I'm in the club and there's lots of girls wearing not a lot of clothing. And lots of guys with enough product in their hair to straighten Weird Al's hair. And it's dark and loud and the fog machine is on overdrive.
The guys I'm with wanted to get bottle service. If you don't know what that is, because you're normal, it's when the club will sell you a bottle of liquor and allow you to sit at a table. Let's say you like Grey Goose, and can buy the bottle for $40 at any store. At a club, that bottle will run you $400, without tax and tip (which is mandatory 20%). I should mention that they throw in the mixers for free, so they're practically giving it away. The allureof bottle service is that you get to sit and look cool. And many times girls will come over to drink your bottle and pretend to talk to you. And you get to feel like a baller for one night before you go back to your job as an Asst Branch Manager for Enterprise or something. The club wanted us to get 3 bottles which we declined.
Things I don't like:
- Expensive drinks
- Noisy ass places
- Cool, hip places
So I spent the night drinking $9 rum and diet cokes, and standing up against a wall with my arms folded and one foot propped agaist the wall, bent at the knee. Just like old times as a cop. I look totally unapproachable, which is okay, because I'd have to yell at the top of my lungs to talk to anyone. So I just sit there and marvel at the show, and how people can be having so much fun.
Fatburger at 5AM made up for it though......Faaattbuuuurgeeer (Said in affect of a zombie)