The Weekend of Northern Aggression

So this weekend found me in Greensboro, NC. My friend Sam from high school is celebrating his 30th birthday tomorrow and his wife Lizzie decided to arrange a surprise for him. Well, it turns out that our other friend Waka was going to be down in Greensboro watching the final performance of his girlfriend's show at the regional theater. So we moved the rumpus down there.

But let's begin at the beginning.

I hate Comair. If you don't know what airline this is, they run the smaller planes for Delta, mostly out of the Northeast. One of the reasons I hate them is that they only fly this plane. This is the CRJ-200. It seats 50 people. I can't stand up in it, and I had to play some perverse game of Twister to take a leak in the back. This plane is the reason I hate regional jets. The other reason I hate Comair is their on-time departure issue. The issue is they are never on time. My flight from BOS to GSO was on-time 50% the last two months, and it didn't disappoint on Friday. We were an hour and a half late taking off.

I was bummed my friends would have to wait for me at the airport. Not to worry. Their flight was also delayed. And the gigantic Triad Piedmont International Airport (Not sure where they fly that needs a passport) closes down at 8PM (Click here for a documentary of my boredom). Graham got there at around 8PM. Soon, though they arrived and we went to dinner. Fun was had by all.

So Sam arrived, carefully deposited by his wife to find us playing whiffle ball and some of us not wearing pants. One couple had their flight cancelled on Friday afternoon and decided to drive down, arriving Saturday around 4PM after stopping, They later admitted they weren't really sure how far Greensboro was from Baltimore, which might have affected their timing.

Now all assembled, we went to see Miriam's show at the local theater. She was magnificent. I'm sure you probably think I'm biased, so I've included a review. And we ate a lot. I had some Krispy Kremes when the Hot Light came on. Miriam didn't know anything about the hot light. God Bless you Hot Light.

We also ate at this feast of geriatric delights called K&W Cafeterias, where for 10 bucks you can stuff yourself. I had a lot of food, but my faves were the turkey ranch casserole and the toasted coconut pie. God I can hear my heart pumping harder as I type it.

We gave Sam some awesome gifts: Denture cream, reading glasses, Depends, Geritol, and enema kit, Just for Men. All of them were gag gifts, which was the funniest part. At least for us. And then I crammed my big ass back on that small plane and flew home.

I told a bunch of people about going down to NC and then I told them it was for a friend's birthday and they looked at me like I had three heads. "You're going to North Carolina for a birthday?" Of course I was. I love those guys, and now I've come to love the women they found. They represent the best parts of me. There is nowhere I wouldn't travel for them and nothing I wouldn't do for them. In a lot of ways, the love I feel for them is as deep as the love I have for my brother. It just feels right when I'm with them.

And they are super fun to be around.

Wow

Sorry for the lack of posting. I'm currently digesting an incredible amount of food from this weekend. Will return tomorrow with an update.

I'm coming Jesus...walking towards that bright light....

A Mental Health Day

Yesterday, I took the day off and allow me to list the wondrous things I accomplished on Tuesday.

1) I woke up at a reasonable hour.
2) Went shopping and bought a power strip and A Few Good Men for a steal at Best Buy.
3) Got my motorcycle learners permit.
4) Got a pork taco and a pupusa from Tacos Lupita.
5) Read a book on my porch while drinking a nice glass of orchata
6) Had a nice dinner outside and then saw The Prestige.

With the exception of the fact that I didn't like the movie in step 6, it was almost a perfect day. I really love days that I got a lot of different stuff done. As for the people who want to know about the learner's permit, my plan was just to get the manual. However, the lady gave me the manual and the ticket for the line which was probably about an hour. So I figured I could study while I waited. I did and I passed. Now I'm just waiting for Chuck to join me and we can go here to become real men.

What time is it?

It's National Public Servant Appreciation Week.

No seriously. Go to your city clerk's office and hug someone, or buy a cup of coffee for your health inspector. Without these people, what would get done? I stand everyday on the vanguard of public safety, and for that I got a nice e-mail from the chief elected official of the Commonwealth and the ability to sleep soundly at night.

Fair trade I suppose.

The weekend

Spent the weekend doing some work. I was in the Ocean State on Saturday for a little bit and then did some laundry on Sunday. Oh, and I changed my brake light. I am in no way a mechanic, however I do enjoy getting my hands dirty. However, oil changes, bulb changes and wiper blade changes are about as far as I'll go. I know how most mechanics and tradespeople make their money by fixing the mistakes of a man who is too dumb to know when to call them.

Tomorrow....a mental health day.

Waka loves the Old Man on the Mountain

Auntie Em! Auntie Em! It's a Twister

Well sort of. Sorry for the lack of posting. I've been busy with a small little drill happening in New England. You can read about it here, which is the only time you'll read the Insurance Journal. You might start subscribing because of me.

So yesterday morning, I got to attend the kick-off for this week long exercise in Rhode Island. Smallest state with the longest name. Anybody know what the full name is? Anyway, to coincide with the kickoff of the Hurricane Awareness Tour, they had the Hurricane Hunter fly in. If you don't know about these guys, lemme give you the gist.

When a hurricane forms in the Southern Atlantic, the only way we know about it is the satellite images.

So here we can see that Mother Nature is bringing a can of whoop ass, however we don't know if it's just a can or a case, or she's rolling in a keg and plans to marry our sister. This is just a picture, we can't tell speed accurately. Radar can do that, but it's range isn't total.

So we call upon the Hurricane Hunters. These guys fly out into the hurricane far off shore. While in the hurricane, they drop these things called dropsondes, which have a GPS chip in them that allows them to be tracked as they fly through the air. So we can get a good picture on wind speed, forward speed of the hurricane, and dimension of the eye wall. These guys all work for the Department of Commerce, which oversees the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, which in turn oversees the National Weather Service.

The wildest part? They fly into the hurricane in this thing....


This is the WP-3D Orion, a variant of the P-3 which is used mostly by the Navy to hunt submarines, and no longer made. This plane above is over 35 years old. We owe these pilots a debt of thanks. And 15 bucks for a copay for a shrink.

Here endeth the lesson.

Looking Inward

People often ask me what I do for a living. Why did I choose the public sector? What do we civil servants do, and why do my tax dollars fund this? These are all really good questions, and I have been thinking about how to respond.

My friend Andrew sent along this video, from a government union, that I think succinctly answers all these questions. It's old, possibly the 70's, but I think the words hold true to this day. My apologies for all the Youtube-ness recently, but I thought this was important.

Happy Friday everyone.

Ahh...lunchbox-san

Forever Hokies

So MB pointed me to Virginia Tech's website where they have a video tribute to the students and faculty they lost. It's a pretty touching photo montage laid over a song by a group I like. Eddie From Ohio is folk-pop-alt country and I first met them when they came to my college. Good people. And this is a really nice song they do a cappella.

Turns out Julie from the group graduated VT in 1988, and the rest of the group is from JMU, another fine Virginia school. If you don't know them, check them out on ITunes.

The tribute can be found here.

Odds and Ends

So I'm doing my homework for my stats class and I'm totally lost. I mean like I'm e-mailing my professor my assignment for tomorrow explaining that there aren't any answers on it. I did as much work as I could, and then I got stuck. Like "hopelessly reading the chapter in the book, talking to myself, wanting to throw my laptop out the window"lost. At this point, I don't care if I fail the assignment, or the class really. I just want it over with. I have enough headaches at work without this also.

Next...if you're in the mood to try European style discount airlines over on this side of the Atlantic, I give you Skybus. They only go to Columbus, Ohio, so if you want to do more than see the home of the Keaton Family, you'll need to buy another ticket. And if you want to leave from Boston, be prepared to drive up to Pease, NH. But if you do want to see The Arch City (huh?) it'll only cost you $10 dollars.

Finally, guess who's no longer the world's largest automaker? Which I'm shocked about, seeing as how they did mass produce a vehicle that looks like this.

More Waka, more funny

An Awesome Saturday

So today started a little early as my friend Tom was over. He was up from Philly and he's a total foodie, so I was nervous about where to take him for brunch. So I settled for this place, which has excellent french toast. And it was hovering around 60 degrees, so it was a nice walk. Then, plump on French toast, we caught a movie at 1PM. I know I know. It's a beautiful day and you went to the movies? Yes. And it was well worth it for the fine film I saw with my friends today.

I urge you to go see Hot Fuzz. It's from the same guys who did Shaun of the Dead, and it takes on all the great cliches of cop movies. Run, do not walk people. It's hysterical. Followed that with viewing Jesus Camp with same friends at the house. Yeah, this one was overkill. Should have gone outside. The movie was scary. Like documentary scared for my children I might not have scary.

But then I went for a walk at the Charlestown Navy Yard, got to see the sunset, and then had a nice dinner. All around a great day. Currently I'm watching some horrible movie with Joshua Jackson and Christina Ricci on the Sci-Fi Channel. Maybe I should quit while I'm ahead.

This guy had to be pissed...

So yesterday was a long day, and given the circumstances, not really a good one. So given that, I had one eye on the Sox game and this one incident provided me my only real bright spot. Everytime I saw this I couldn't help but laugh. Think about how much of a statement this is. do you have any idea how much pizza at Fenway costs?

God I do love this town sometimes.

What a day...

So I was going to write about how crazy today was with the marathon and the rain event. And how I was on TV a lot, because everytime I was on the phone, it seemed like there was a news camera in my face. And then I was going to talk about the fact that some drunk guy got hit in the face with a pizza at Fenway today.



But the word came that the tragedy at Virginia Tech had turned into an unimaginable terror. 33 people dead so far. No one knows exactly for sure what happened, and I'm sure this will be examined and dissected for years to come. But for now, let us mourn. For the people who died, their familes and friends, and the emergency workers who tried to save them. Let's not armchair quarterback this, as it detracts from the fact that we lost a lot of bright young treasures today, and this is a sad day for all of us.

Martin Luther King Jr said in his last sermon, "I know, somehow, that only when it is dark enough, can you see the stars."

There must be thousands of stars visible tonight from the small town of Blacksburg, Virginia.

Oh...and

This guy was almost killed. But it's not even a top story on CNN.com anymore.

The tie in is that he was going to the sit down between Imus and the Scarlet Knights.

Always wear your seatbelt.....

Bye for now, I-Man

So Don Imus, good ole' Chicken Neck, has been fired from CBS Radio for calling the Rutgers womens basketball team, "nappy headed hos." This story has been huge and it was picked up and carried everywhere. Of course, it helped that media whores Jesse Jackson and Reverend Al were screaming the loudest.

I was listening to Imus when I was a kid. I used to wake up in the mornings and listen to him in grade school. I didn't always understand everything, but I sort of grew up with him. Then Imus got syndicated and got grown-up. He also stopped doing coke, which was good for his body and not so great for his comedy. He started fancying himself as a power broker and had lots of politicians and reporters on his show. He always seemed more clever than Stern. And he got fired for saying something dumb.

I'll grant you it was dumb. And certainly warrants an apology as those girls were innocent and didn't deserve to be treated like that. But if that's why he got fired, then let it be that. And not because he put down black women, which happens on BET almost everyday. Reverend Al doesn't scream bloody murder outside their doors everyday.

I also guess I'm tired of hearing of people talk about how he's spewing hate on public airwaves. Imus doesn't spew hate. He makes fun of people. Are the jokes tasteless, or racist sometimes, probably. But that's humor, not hate. Ironically, Bill O'Reilly spews more hate and he's celebrated and still on the air. And how are the airwaves public. He wasn't on NPR. Those airwaves are private, and if you haven't realized that there are maybe three companies with 90% of the listeners in this country, then you need to wake up. For a list of the CBS radio stations in your area, click here. I have 5 of them.

I'm sure some of my friends will disagree. They will say that this is one more hate mongerer that will not be allowed to spread their vitrol. I think all of this takes away from the important issues, like the teen pregnancy rate in low-income neighborhoods, or the high dropout rate in the inner cities (that's code for "where whitey doesn't live.") Good luck Imus. I'll miss you and Bernie and Charles and Rob Bartlett, even though I haven't listened to you in quite awhile.

Can someone stop the ride? I'd like to get off, please.

More Lunchbox...

G'head. Take a look. You know you want to.

Its almost 2AM....

I just finished Season 3 of The Wire, which I got in those magical red envelopes. Mine come from Worcester, MA. I stayed up late tonight watching 4 episodes in a row because the show is like crack. There are three words to describe the final episode of Season 3.

Fan Fucking Tastic.

Goddamn I'm going to be twitching and scratching myself like a crackhead until Season 4 releases on DVD.

I must be on the wrong list.

So the Handyman Club of American sent me this offer to join their club today. I get to try out tools and they sent me stickers, and address labels and a whole bunch of other stuff. I'm not sure they've done their market research. I get lost every time I go to Home Depot. I break a lot of stuff, and can never put it back together.

But they saw fit to send me this. I'm going to buy a tool belt. This is God talking.

Happy Easter

I was tempted to write in "Hoppy Easter" but that was too cliched. And I got to do it here anyway. I've had two Easter dinners and three Easter desserts in the past 24 hours. First, last night, Chuck and Sara were kind enough to invite me to their place. Where Ross and I dined with them and most of Sara's family. They had driven in from Missouri. Great people. The highlight was playing pronounce this town name, with us swapping Missouri towns and Massachusetts ones.

Then today, went to the roommate's family's Easter Dinner. Had more ham. I'm not getting the whole ham thing. Is it because we were denied ham on Friday that we gorge ourselves on it on Sunday? So that was good. Two screaming kids, hopped up on Easter candy. It was like birth control for me. And then off to the roommate's girlfriend's family place for dessert. More family. More cake.

To bite off Chief Joseph, I shall eat no more forever.

So I'm sure you're wondering what else. And I didn't want to just regale you with tales of ham. So I found this example of a very poor employee. If you're ever late with a report, don't do what this crazy bitch did. I don't care how late those TPS reports are.

Stress....

So I'm burning the candle from both ends, what with work and grad school and it's getting to me. I've got this huge project for work that demands a lot of my time, including many weekends. Oh, and I have finals too. I haven't read for school in a few weeks.

So in the midst of all this, I turn to this commercial from an LA electronics store (Consumerist). Thank you Crazy Gideon, for you have made me feel sane watching you. My favorite is by far the "Wow" halfway through.

Bandwagon is leaving town...

So I became the last person in the world to see The Departed. I loved it. It was pure Scorcese. My favorite line was probably this one.

"Fuck you, fuckin' queers. Fucking firemen gettin' pussy for the first time in the history of fire or pussy. Go save a cat from a tree, you fucking homos."

Oh, that made me laugh. So go see it if you haven't already. I'm going to buy it. It was a nice way to wind up the weekend, after I worked on Saturday.

America's War Standings

And in addition to this amazing beer, I have my good friend Waka's genius to make me laugh out loud. The MVP part is awesome. Enjoy this on your Fridays, children.

So today...

Let's see, it's 60 degrees today and I was in a good mood for most of the day. And then in the car ride home, I had a conversation that mentioned my ex-girlfriend. And then the slide began, and I realized two years later I'm not quite over her. And maybe I'll never find the right girl, because I'll never let myself recognize her. So that put me in a little funk.

Went home, decided to go for a run and came back to find my tax return returned for my signatures.

I owe Massachusetts about $150 bucks
I get $1,000 from Uncle Sam
I owe the accountant $400

Which leaves me with $450.00 Which is not the windfall I had expected. I had done much better last year. But perhaps having them done properly is the price I pay.

But then I had this...
It's called Leinenkugel's Sunset Wheat, and it tastes like happiness. I had it first in Philly with some friends and it altered my life. So, sure my life isn't always where I want it to be. And I'd really like to be able to have a relationship without blowing it up. But right now, drinking this beer, my world is recentered. It's amazing what some hops, barley and coriander can do. Thank you, good people of Chippewa Falls, WI. Thank you.

Mmmm....Shawarma

Had Shawarma tonight at, where else, the Shawarma King 2. There isn't an original. I think there was once, but no longer. I find it funny that they keep the 2. Probably some tax code thing. The beef-lamb shawarma sandwich with hummus inside was delicious.

Also, I signed up to take the police test in Massachusetts. Here, the state offers one test for everyone. One test to rule them all. Chuck sent around an e-mail asking people who was man enough to be Boston's finest. Now, this doesn't mean I'm going to be a cop. It really means that if I don't take this test, then I'll be too old to take the next one. Kinda sucks to be getting to the stage where you're too old to take a job.

Oh, and Boston apparently has some residency requirement to take the test for them, in which case I couldn't be a Boston cop. Which is sad, because that is one of the few places in MA that I would be a cop.

Oh, and I'm sure you have all seen this, but I hadn't yet and someone forwarded it to me when I was going nuts at work and I laughed. Which is good.

Never say that government is lazy

I was at work tonight until 8PM. I know, some say work smarter and not harder. I hate that expression. Though it wasn't all work. My friend Emily, who is from New Orleans, and I are dreaming up a screenplay about a tough New York Cop and a genteel Southern Belle FBI agent who are forced to collaborate on a murder case in the city. Basically, we just send each other snippits of dialogue, or ideas for scenes. They must be cliched.

The title is Mason Vs. Dixon, which obviously are their names. Anyone know which one is from New York? This is a trivia question....

Waka brings the funny....

I've decided to post my friend's political video blog each week..... enjoy!

Alcohol is the devil

So last night, went to to Gotham, and attended the 30th birthday party of my old partner Will. It was at this place called Kinsale, an Irish bar near my parent's house. Drank some Guiness, a few Black and Tans, did some Irish Car Bombs....

And then I got sick. I think they declared the bathroom a "Hot Zone" which means that only people on portable oxygen could go in there. I'm sorry Kinsale. That's what happens when you sell me waaay too many delicious beers. I had a great time with Will and his girlfriend and sister and the whole crew. How do you not like a group of guys with names like Blackie, Flaco, and Black Joe?

Pulled my ass out of bed and drove back home. Saw two movies off the Netflix queue tonight. First was the Illusionist. Very good. Get it if you haven't already. I enjoyed it quite a lot. The second movie was Saints and Soldiers, which was a low-budget, well done WW2 movie from 2003. It was good. For under a million bucks, it was great. So if you like this kind of stuff (Chuck), you should rent it.

Today is a good day....

Hey,

So my friend from Maine will keep his decrepit firehouse. The Hallowell, ME City Council agreed that it was a ridiculous idea.

I called in and took the day this morning, which is because I didn't take my Evacuation Day Holiday. It's a beautiful day on Boston. I walked up to this brunch place called the Broken Yolk and had some really good french toast. And then I took the walk back to call some pals from my NYPD days. My old partner is celebrating his 30th birthday tonight, so I'm driving down to party with him. Hopefully some of the guys might show up.

It's amazing sometimes how much one day or even a morning can help your mental health. Life is good today. It doesn't mean that there aren't issues, or that I don't have internal crap. But at this very moment, sitting on my porch in the sunlight....life is perfect.

Embarassing photo of Will courtesy of his wonderful and beautiful sister Wendy.

Ah yuh

I am back from the wilds of Maine! Well, they weren't so wild. I was actually staying at a Comfort Inn outside of Augusta. I had a meeting up there for work. It was a nice place. I found a great brew pub called the Liberal Cup in Hallowell, ME. Smallest City in America apparently, with around 2,400 residents.

Anyway, a colleague of mine is also the fire chief up there. Small department, 2 engines and 15 volunteers. This marks his 25th year as chief. And how does the city reward him for his services?

They tell him he needs to move his firehouse, so that they can put a restaurant in there. Apparently, the largest restaurant in town had a fire a few weeks back and needs to find new space. Poor Mike. He was blindsided. I hope he gets to keep his firehouse. Where the hell will they put the trucks?

I'm back for a little while. I just saw "The Virgin Suicides." Beautiful movie. Sad and yet a love story. It was a really touching viewpoint from the boys across the street.

No, I'm not dead.

Good Evening...This might be a post over several days.



I'm sorry for the long time without posting. I assure you I'm fine. I lost radio silence about 10 days ago...when I went to.......

NYC! In the heezy. I was down there to see my old roommate, Jennie Meier, a dear friend of mine. We watched a fantastic movie on Friday night named, "Snakes on a Plane."
Best line by far was when Samuel Jackson looked into the camera and stated "We got muthafuckin' snakes on this muthafuckin' plane!" And yes, I realize that this line was played out months ago, but I still fell out of my seat. I especially liked the fact that that line was added after the movie wrapped because of an internet parody.

On Saturday I got to see my dear friend Adam "Waka" Green in a show Off-Broadway. He was in a play called "The Last Word." He co-starred with Daniel J. Travanti whom some of you might know from this show. He was excellent and I got to have brunch the next morning with the crew from high school, which was awesome. It's really so nice to have everyone together. It's like family. Actually a lot better, because there's no drama. And I'll have someone at some point to bring to these gatherings. I'm thinking about an escort next time, just for shock factor. Not that these guys are easily shocked.

And then it was off on Sunday afternoon to Emmittsburg, MD. Wha-hoo! I'll write about that tomorrow. This kid is tired. Apparently my grad school is on Spring Break, but that just lets me do all the assignments I didn't last week when I was working.

Welcome back.

Support the old Alma Mater

I knew Anne Harris when she was in my class at Vassar. She sang in another acappella group and was also really funny. She and her friend started a band called the "Ukes of Hazzard." They promptly got a letter from the people that own the rights to the Dukes of Hazzard. So know they are simply The Hazzards.

Here is one of their videos. It was a big techno hit in Europe. And yes, I know her friends's voice is a little off-key. That's not really the point now is it. And if you look closely, you can spot Jon Togo, another classmate from VC, who is currently on CSI-Miami. So visit the site, and buy some swag.

I am smarter than a 5th grader

For those of you who are curious as to why this month ends today, Slate has a pretty decent answer here.

I like to think that it gets us to St. Patty's Day faster, for which I am truly grateful.

I should work for the federal government

I spent last night and today at the Century House Hotel in Latham, NY. It was a decent place, with a surprisingly decent and cheap restaurant. Great crisp bacon on the cheeseburger last night.

But that's where the goodness ended. We were ostensibly there to get answers from our federal counterparts about this giant federal initiative called NIMS. In the end, it ended up that the guy ended up taking a bunch of things back to the "home office." Well I could have told him we needed guidance on a conference call. He was very good at taking hard questions and deflecting them back. Just a hint..."That's a great question" always means "I wish you would have been killed by a massive heart attack seconds before you asked that question." There wasn't so much with the answers. And the guy kept calling me a yuppie, because I was wearing a suit. I should have pointed out that there are very few yuppies in state government. And my suit was from K&G, a place that most yuppies wouldn't be caught dead in. I should have punched him.

So I drove with some colleagues 2.5 hours to basically drink some bad coffee, and see an Albany suburb. And the crisp bacon. Maybe it was worth it....mmmm...bacon.

I need a longer weekend

This weekend was the annual installation dinner for the Red Oaks Mill Fire Company of the Arlington Fire District. I volunteered there my last two years in college as a Firefighter/EMT. It was a blast, and it's also where I honed my drinking skills. Went down to Poughkeepsie for the dinner this year, and had a good time. But my body can't really handle that kind of drinking much anymore.

I woke up this morning fully clothed on a couch in my friend's Vinnie's house. I was sleeping on a tacquito, and there were beer bottles everywhere. Some things down there never change. One guy's wife was still drinking a lot and groping other men, not me, on the dance floor.

I love the Hudson Valley. It's a really pretty area. I had breakfast this morning with a really nice woman named Susan who works for Vassar College Development. Apparently they want me to be the 10th reunion leadership gifts chair. So I said sure, mostly because I have no idea what that means.

I'm in Latham, NY tomorrow night. Awww yeah. Federal meeting. And they're not paying for lunch. I'm loving it.

What if.....

Talking to a friend over dinner. Wrap your noodle around this one.

Some people think that the Pearly Gates are equivalent to the movie, Defending Your Life, which was a passable flick with Albert Brooks and Meryl Streep. Cute in an "Always on HBO in 1993" sort of way. The premise was basically you are judged upon your acts in your life to determine whether you go to Heaven, Purgatory, or Hell. Your entire life is taped by God's cinematographer and is evidence before a panel of judges.

What if that's not quite what happens? What if you're judged on the deeds and lives of your partners. So all of your ex-boyfriends, ex-husbands lives are screened. Imagine seeing those faces when you walk into that courtroom. Might make you ladies choose fewer bad boys.

Just something to chew on, on this our day of rest.

Awesome Movie

Run, do not walk, to the video store (Netflix queue) and rent or buy Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. One of the darker comedies I've seen in awhile. It stars Val Kilmer and Robert Downey Jr. Both give great performances. It had action and incredible dialogue and editing. My favorite line was probably when Val Kilmer is standing over an evil henchman and utters the line, "This isn't good cop, bad cop. This is fag and New Yorker. You're screwed."

That and where Robert Downey Jr. is complaining about the L.A. women and says, "I swear to God, it's like somebody took America by the East Coast, and shook it, and all the normal girls managed to hang on." Really funny. It was a perfect day-off afternoon film. I'm going to add it to my library.

Other incidental numbers: The Ford hit 136,000 miles today.
I've lost 10 pounds.

Weekend Update

The folks were in town for my uncle's party last night and so we hit up Hammersley's Bistro on Friday night, in the South End. Had the duck confit app, followed by the roast chicken. I know you're thinking, "Boring. Who the hell goes out on their parent's dime and get chicken?" Well it was really good. It was infused with lemon and garlic. Sooo tasty. Easily as tasty as Casey.

Last night was the party, with the highlights being getting to talk to my cousins. They're great, and one of them is expecting a child in July. Well, it's his wife actually, but I guess that counts. Though he's not squeezing something the size of a watermelon out of his ass, so maybe he shouldn't get credit. The other highlight would be the cute girls who were catering.

And today I went to see a movie with my roommate. We saw "The Last King of Scotland." It was really good. I heartily recommend it to anyone. The scottish kid, James McAvoy, was good. But who cares? This was all about Forest Whitaker from the start. And boy did he pull it off. Go see it for him alone. And as an added bonus, you'll see Gillian Anderson of "X-Files" fame, playing an English doctor's wife. Time has been good to her.

That's all. A much better Sunday than last week. And tomorrow off. Wha-hoo! For those that have to work, I'll think of the President's for you.

I could skate on my parking lot..

So the snow came and then it turned to rain. And then the rain turned to ice. And because of the deal that the 2005 Red Sox made with the Devil, it won't melt ever. Seriously.

Also to the side, you'll notice a map from Yelp. It's a foodie site mostly. You can track my reviews. The flag all the way down in North Carolina belongs to Yana's Burgers. Top 3 cheeseburgers ever. And this kid likes cheeseburgers.

There's a dinner on Saturday night at my uncle's place. Should be fun. Family dynamics + alcohol = interesting times. Anyone have a better President's Day Weekend planned that possible boozing with relatives?

Tomorrow is going to blow

So, a little update on the old blog....

The Valentine's Day Storm is coming!
The Valentine's Day Storm is coming!

The National Weather Service is predicting a mix of snow/sleet/rain/armageddon to hit Massachusetts starting around 4AM tomorrow. Snow totals will be around 5 inches around Boston with as much as 2 feet in the western part of the state. The Weather Channel has an omnious looking graphic (pictured above) to explain to those who can't read. Go buy your bread and milk now, kids.

I'll be working a 12-hour shift tomorrow, because sadly not only does my mother think I'm essential, the Governor does too. So I'll let you know if anything good happens. I should be pretty quiet, though.

Tomorrow is also Valentine's Day. A wonderful day that makes those in a relationship shell out money for dumb things like teddy bears and chocolate. Those who are single will shell out money on Cheetos and booze, which is the normal Wednesday night. If you couples took your V-day money and put it in a money market account, you might be able to buy a car in 25 years. Think about that.

And for those single people, myself included, apparently we have a day too. It's February 15th, so we get sloppy seconds. For all those people who are in a couple, have some good lovin' tomorrow night. And for those single folks, make sure you love yourself tomorrow night.

Set the bar low and trip over it...

So the Celtics have dropped 18 straight, with tonights loss to the Timberwolves. This is a franchise record. These guys are awful. The record number of straight losses in a single season is currently held by 1996 Vancouver (Memphis) Grizzlies, at 23. This was their first year as a franchise, so I cut them a little slack. This year marks the Celts 60th year in play.

I say, let's be first at being last. Let's shatter that previous record of dubious distinction. We deserve it. At least we can be in the record books for something.

They should be ashamed of charging for seats. Seriously

Ever feel completely unproductive?

So today I didn't leave the house. I did leave the apartment, as I was doing laundry and had to go to the basement to switch loads. But I never set foot outside the dwelling. Something can't be right about that. I did some homework, did some laundry, and played a lot of video games. Oh, and saw the Punisher on cable. And some of Sniper. I wonder if Chuck was watching it at the same time.

Now, I'm not good alone. Some people love being alone. They yearn for the time to handle their affairs or just spend it in solitude. Not me. I like to be surrounded by people, which I was not today. And while I did okay, it felt like I wasted a day. I made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and reheated some pizza. That and coffee were my daily sustenance.

I insulted some friends of mine, not on purpose. And I spent some time feeling like a chump for that. Today, when you come down to it, wasn't much of a Sunday. I probably could have gone in to work today and gotten some stuff done. Would have made me feel more productive. I guess you need days like this to really appreciate quality times.

I'm thinking about a vacation. Of course, I'm going solo. Any ideas where to go? I want to leave Massachusetts. I'm open to suggestions.

It's like Remember the Titans, but with basketballs

Tonight, I opened up my latest bright red envelope to find Glory Road. This movie follows the story of Coach Don Haskins, played by Josh Lucas, of Texas Western College, now UT-El Paso. He led his team to the NCAA Championship in 1966. What was remarkable was that he started an all-black lineup for the final game versus Kentucky.

You've seen it all before. It really didn't go into the same character development as other movies of this type might. There were cliches, but at it's heart, it's a feel good story and you want to get hooked. It followed a formula, but on a cold Tuesday night it seemed like a good fit.

Overall grade: B+

It's like Ice Station Zebra Cold

So, I decided to work from home after my morning meetings. I have to do some writing, and work is quite the distracting place. Between the e-mails, and the people stopping by, it's hard to get stuff done.

I just wanted to let those people not in the Northeast and Midwest know...it's fucking cold. The folks at Accuweather are telling me currently it's 17 degrees, but it feels like -11.

Awesome. This is photo, taken at a fire in New Jersey, aptly shows how cold it is.

I like the rainbow in the background. It's too cold for men to go outside. Especially if you're trying to have kids. I fear the boys will retreat far inside you. And they might like it there, make new friends, think about buying a weekend place together, and never, ever come back down.

This frigid day also reminds me of this event, that happened in Portland less than a month ago.



The guy who drove the Volvo SUV(The first SUV in the clip)apparently didn't get the memo in Driver's Ed that said take your foot off the gas when you're sliding. Oh, and he was 79, which I'm sure had nothing to do with it.

I can't believe it's Sunday night

So this weekend has come and gone quite quickly. Saturday was a good time, and I spent it with Chuck out in Western Mass. We went to the Springfield Armory, which is where John Garand created the M1, which protected our boys in World War 2. Then last night, I went to Target and bought an Xbox 360 from Target.



Good Stuff. Played it some last night and a little bit today for a study break. Had people over for the Super Bowl. Chuck and his lovely wife Sara, Steve, and Amanda were kind enough to join me for the game. Chuck brought a lot of food, and broke the cover to his crockpot on my icy steps. Sorry dude, but what real man carries a crockpot? Your barbeque cocktail wieners were delicious though. The game sucked, as did the ads. About the only thing I enjoyed more than watching Rex Grossman suck like it was his job, was watching all of those CEOs and rich kids get soaked in the rain.

I can't believe it's Sunday night. Man, the weekend went fast.

Everyone Panic. Now Stop. Now Summon Righteous Indignation

So I'm a little late on this, my apologies. Many friends have asked whether I got involved as the dutiful civil servant I am. Asides from monitoring it, the answer is no. I would have gotten involved had these turned out to be more than Lite Brites.

This wasn't a hoax. I hate when the media called it that. They weren't supposed to look like bombs. Bomb hoax sounds better than Bomb mistake. Or poor judgement. I personally think the biggest thing that these kids did wrong was place them under bridges and overpasses. That wasn't too bright.

The guys they arrested called themselves "artists." Maybe so, but not for this. I could have paid a homeless guy two sandwiches and a bottle of Night Train to put up magnets on metal all across the city. That's not art, guys. These guys had the easy out. When asked, they could have said this...

I'm so sorry that this has happened. I am just trying to earn a few extra dollars to help my blind grandmother. I had no idea this would turn out this way. I was just doing a small job.

The city would have embraced these odd looking dudes and turned on Turner as the big corporate monster. Charges dropped and fade into obscurity. However, these guys chose to go this route.



Whatever....it sure knocks out the sympathy vote.

To credit Fark, my favorite line about this whole thing:

The only thing that separates an IED from an led is a lower case "l"

The Hip, Hooray and Ballyhoo

So today is the final day of January. Where the hell did this month go? 2007 seems like it might be another fast year. This is going to be the Broadway issue of Ramblings. I'd like to say that I have two friends of mine on Broadway and Off-Broadway shows.

First up is Adam "Waka" Green. One of my closest friends. We met in high school and he's a really talented actor. He kept going while slackers like Sam and I stopped. And Sam's not doing anything with this life, except for clerking for a federal judge. Loooser. Waka is currently in a show with Daniel J. Travanti. And yes, you get point if you know what TV show he was in.
If you're in NYC, you should see it. Waka is a great actor and an amazing friend.

My next friend is Jeslyn Kelly, who is currently in the ensemble cast in Tarzan. Now before you go moaning about musicals and think that she's some sort of high maintenance diva, allow me to set the record straight. Jessica, now Jeslyn, is one of the nicest and kindest people I know. She's has ferocious talent, is beautiful, and one of the few people I could be marooned on an island with. (And that list gets shorter every day.) I have no idea what the show is like, but she swings on vines, which is cool. And she's on Broadway! An incredible feat for a wonderful girl from Trumbull.

Happy Wednesday party peoples.

On Tuesday, I'll be at the Chuckle Hut

Make sure to tip your waitresses, folks.

So today I gave a presentation on School Safety Planning with my usual humor and energy at a Voc Tech school in the state. And a very nice group of school nurses who sat through the presentation told me I should do stand-up. One said I reminded her of Conan O'Brien. I get this from time to time.


I haven't done stand-up for a couple of reasons. One, I think I'm funny in situations, but I'm not sure I could write material. Second, if you do stand-up, you're expected to be funny. If you meet a stand-up, you expect that guy to be funnier than you. That's not fun. I'd rather be funny and have people not expect it. Also, humor works really well in my job as a tool.

Perhaps it's my incredible fear of failure and bombing though. Yeah...that could be it too.

Oh, and my phone has been on the fritz and not getting or sending texts or voicemail. So I called Satan's Company, who informed me that they are part of AT&T again. Nice job blowing all that branding money, guys. I'm sure my bill didn't eat any of that. And the CSR (Customer Service Rep) on the phone listened to my problem and asked me if I turn the phone off at night. WTF? No, I don't turn the phone off at night. "Well that's your problem right there!" Like I should know that your phone can't be used longer that 23 hours and 59 minutes. My bad.

So I turn the damn thing off and back on, and it starts vibrating and making all this noise. It's sending text messages that I meant to send all of last week. I'm getting text messages from the last 6 days. And then the screen shows that I have 19 new voicemails. Well fuck me silly and call me Sally. What the hell is this?

So if you've gotten a random text, lo siento. And if you called my phone at all recently and I didn't call back, I'm just starting to wade through those voicemails.

(Shakes fist at sky) Damn you Cingular!

Weekend Recap...

Let's go over this weekend....

Friday night: Went to dinner with my brother in Kenmore Square. Nearly froze ass off.

Saturday: Went to the Higgins Museum in Worcester, MA with my little. (N.B. When I use the term "little", I am referring to the little brother I have through the Big Brothers program. This causes endless confusion.) Then that evening went out to dinner with Chuck and Ross. We started here, and then went here, but the line was too long and I had to use the bathroom in an unholy way, so we went here. Following some drunken singing, we ended up here where we didn't bowl and I then went home with Chuck. Not like that....he wishes.

Sunday: Woke up quite late. Had some coffee and did some studying. Then my friend Amanda and I had sushi and watched MI-3. The ending was really the worst part. I'm not a fan of Tom Cruise as a person, but the action was okay.

Tomorrow I'm off to Tyngsboro at 6AM....whahoo!

So at 2:06PM today, this pathetic little spot on the internets hit 5,000 hits. The person who did it was from somewhere in Middle America and was on the site for one second. I'm sure they were scared and couldn't wrap their small pea-brains around the enormity of this achievement and clicked away. Well, thank you small pea-brained (wo)man.

It's Friday and I'm about to head out to the B.C./BU hockey game. I'll bring the old camera and try and get some photos of me and Ross. Oh, and for those of you not from around here, the Explorer's thermometer was kind enough to tell me it was 9 degrees about an hour ago. Wha-Hoo!

Hump Day

Greetings all those out in Internet Land!

I survived my incredibly early morning on the Cape. It actually didn't take me that long, thanks to the shortcut through the Tunnel. Very clean and well-lit.

My Dad called and I was talking to him and he mentioned that a friend of his knows a guy who works doing similar stuff to what I do for the private sector. He mentioned that as a father, he wanted to make sure I was as well off financially as I could be and that I should be paid the money I deserve.

Okay, listen up. I don't do this job for the money. I certainly wasn't a cop for the money, even though I'm still not making what I made there with overtime. I do what I do so that I can lay my head down on the pillow and be okay with myself. So that I don't need to give obsessively to charity or find a way to make a difference in my senior years. I want to drink a lot and hang out with friends when I'm old. I figure if I help society now, I'll have earned that by 65 or whenever.

In fairness, the company is apparently a non-profit helping the developing world, which is cool. I'm fine right now where I am though. I really enjoyed teaching yesterday and I enjoy the looks on people's faces when they get it. Would I like a little more money? I guess. But I wouldn't know what to spend it on. To be honest, with the friends I have, I often feel like the richest man around. I know it's cheesy, but it's true.

Is this that hard to comprehend? Have a great Wednesday people.

Neither rain, nor sleet, nor the darkness of pre-dawn

Good Morning,

I woke up about 15 minutes ago. I just wanted to talk to you people who think that this guy to the right is typical state worker. Perhaps he is, but there are many of us who work much harder. I'm on my way to the Cape to teach the class. And while it is 2 hours away, I'm happy to serve all of the Commonwealth.

And the Cape is a very different place when its January and snowing, just so you know. It's damn cold.

I hope everyone has a nice day.....

Meh...

So apparently the Bears dat team dat goin' beat dem Saints. It was a super sloppy game and the Saints were turning over the ball like it was their job. But whatever you do, don't congratulate Rex Grossman. That guy is a shaky dude who looked completely bewildered. I think Lovie's only plan was to keep the ball out of his hands.

As I type, the Pats are up by 3 with 2 minutes left in the game and the Colts are threatening to score from within the Red Zone. They really choked on this one...not a great football day.

Ahhh, Saturdays

So for those not in the Boston area, it was cold and windy today. Really windy. And I got to wake up and join my god-niece for brunch with my brother near Copley. That was fun, but cold. Elizabeth is a really wonderful girl who goes to school in New Haven, which is the way really horrible people say that they go to Yale. N.B.: Elizabeth would never say this, and is not a horrible person.

After that I was home watching some of Season 1 of Boomtown. This is a cop show that lasted for about 1.5 seasons. Ordinarily I don't like cop shows as they are unrealistic. This one takes some liberties for sure, but the cast is great. They also shoot the show from each individual character's perspective, which is neat. And the reporter character is cute., pictured right.

And then I went to a dinner for my friend Dave, who is going to the Left Coast for a 6-month internship. It was fun and I hung out with my friends Rene and Mike, who are an awesome couple that just bought a house in Dorchester. Chuck and Sara joined us at the bar afterwards. They were dressed to the nines and had come from Sara's work party. And while it was nice to not have someone that drags you to their social events, it made me think that I'd like to have someone to get really dressed up with and have a night out. Ah well....it will happen. Apparently all my friends have lots of cute single friends. I'm not holding my breath.

Finally, this guy below is Boston. Sure, New York has the Kid from Brooklyn. But you won't find a guy like this in places like Phoenix or Tampa. God bless my drunken Irish friends.

Oh boy...

I'm currently watching a movie called Cube. It's awful. And I'm in agreement with many critics. It's about these people trapped in a bizarre cube maze, with interconnected death chambers. As a guy who likes bad movies, this is not enjoyable.

However, my dear friend Jennie pointed me to this wondrous site.

BadMovies.org

The best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup

If you have to be up at the ass crack of dawn to teach a workshop, I find this hot cup of joe sitting next to me to be about the best thing ever. Thank you Keurig and thank you Juan Valdez. Wherever you are.

First class of the second semester tonight. It involves stats....oh boy.

Keurig

Keurig
Originally uploaded by Graham14173.

Here is the coffeemaker I love. I am doing it through Flickr because Blogger blows and won't post my photos for some reason.

Thank God UPS doesn't love MLK.

So today my new coffeemaker arrived. My fabulous sister-in-law Carole got me a $100 gift certificate from Amazon for Christmas. So I took that and spent a few extra bucks on the Keurig B-70 coffeemaker. Many of these people have seen these at their office, but it essentially brews one cup at a time. I got the one that is able to brew travel size mugs, so I don't keep spending money at this place.


I also like that the water tank is lit with a blue LED when it's brewing. I was surprised that UPS delivers today. It's odd how this is a holiday because people have it off, but it's not supposed to be a "think about this special time" holiday. Otherwise the stores would be closed.

I've posted his last, and what I think is his best speech. His "Mountaintop" speech where he preaches that he doesn't care if he dies because he's been to the mountaintop. The graphics are cheesy, but just listen to this speech and tell me you don't feel chills when he gets to the "Mine eyes have seen the glory..." part.

Who Dat?

So tonight I went out for dinner and drinks at a bar called Sissy K's near Faneuil Hall. The place is okay. It's main draw being $1.50 Bud Lights. I was there to watch the Saints-Eagles game.

Allow me to say right now that I am a Saints fan. I have been since September of 1998, when I saw my first live NFL game at the Superdome. They lost to the Kansas City Chiefs 17-30, which I soon discovered was pretty normal for this team. But I was gleeful to watch them defeat the Eagles for the right to play in the NFC Championship for the first time in team history. My best friend Emily was at the game and we talked after the game. Her family is my second family and I'm quite excited about celebrating her 30th birthday coming up in May.

Now in Boston, the bars close around 1-1:30. And my brother hates the bar scene in Boston. I think it's really the bar scene around Faneuil Hall. There are ubiquitous lines and cover charges for no particular reason. These things you don't see in New York, unless there's a band or a special event. I guess the bus loads of white hats from this area don't mind standing in lines and paying 5 bucks just for the privilege of drinking piss beer. I'll pass, thanks.

I can sit at home and drink piss beer. Maybe I'll put a velvet rope up outside my door and start charging.

The digits workin' again

So I ordered an unlocked phone off Ebay a little after Christmas, and it arrived yesterday. The buying process was okay...the phone took forever to arrive. I mean forever, but it cost 50 bucks and I would have had to pay those crooks at Cingular like $250 to get a new one. No thank you. I prefer someone to rub my back if they're going to bend me over.

It was really easy to do, which is why I would recommend to people to just go month to month, so as not to be shackled to their carrier. And they gave me the new Sim card free. But, all this is to say that I apologize to the people who tried to call me in the last month and couldn't get through. I saved all my contact on my Macbook and just transferred it to the new phone by Bluefizzle.

So resume normal calling patterns.....whatever that means. Oh and big ups to my friend Steve who got me the audio file of Jeff Daniels screaming "Bayonets!" from Gettysburg that now plays when I get a text message.

Photo of Cingular dude getting screwed in the ass courtesy of those fine folks over at Consumerist

Ike, do your impression of David Caruso's career!

So, I am not a large fan of David Caruso. I thought he worked well on NYPD Blue, but he made a dumb move by leaving the show. Well, now he's on CSI Miami and I can't stand him. (Note: I went to college with a guy who is also on that show. I like him. Nice guy. I just can't stand Caruso)

Asides from the fact that the show is crap, because there's no forensics lab that can spend 1 week on one case, especially not in a busy city like Miami, it also makes it hard for real cops.

People are dumb. They believe TV is real. I had some guy get hit with a stick once and insist that I dust the stick for prints. No bueno. He said it happened on CSI and I just didn't want to do it because I'm white and no one cares about Harlem.....(Sigh)

But some guy cataloged all of the best Caruso-isms from that awful show and made a montage on where else...You Tube. I offer it below as evidence that people that watch that show are brain damaged.



Now I know that I've posted a bunch of YouTube stuff. And except for the R.Kelly "Trapped in the Closet" piece, you really don't have to watch any of them. Peruse at your own enjoyment.

Celtics Game....oh the mediocrity

So last night, I went to a Boston Celtics game, courtesy of Big Brothers of Massachusetts Bay. The tickets were free, but parking was $23.00. Even with comp tickets, the Celtics weren't worth it.

The seats were really high. I mean, like so high that the fan camera than pans the audience was below us and therefore unable to see our section. I actually saw one player yawn during the pre-game warmups, which I felt was oddly appropriate for this team. The place was half-full and why shouldn't it be. They're second to last in their conference, with a 12-22 record. And even with that record, they're only 3 games back from the first place team.

I realized something about the NBA. It's all about the kids. That place was packed with kids on a school night. Why? Because the kids don't realize how much the Celtics suck. They don't understand that their Dad or Mom paid $50 for their seat. They don't really care if the team loses, because it's loud, there's always something going on, and they're probably up past their bedtime. This is the Celtics target demographic. Children under 12 and people who can't grasp how poor the team they're watching is. And certainly people who don't remember this guy....


The only bright spot of the evening was the Celtics Dancers.

It was good fun to watch these women come out in their quite skimpy outfits during the timeouts. The fathers all seemed to perk up as these women danced with moves that could only be reproduced in a strip club. All in the name of family entertainment. Three of the Celtics girls are in the running to be the Celtics rep for the NBA dance team. I personally want Allison to win.

More Waka...More Funny

Busy Busy Busy

So today I missed lunch...well I just had meetings all the way through it.

So for lunch today I had a strawberry Nutrigrain bar from the vending machine. Then before my doctor's appointment I saw a sandwich at 7-11 for $1.99. Ham and cheese. So I got that and ate it quick. It was kind of hard and then I checked the wrapper and noticed that it was made on Sunday. So, that's what happens when you troll for bargain lunch meats at the Sev.

Also, the cold is worse. I actually feel better but I know I'm worse. I can smell that cold. You know how you can smell infection or death, mostly due to the necrotic tissue. Well sickness smells a certain way also, especially when you cough. And no Mom, I haven't gone to the doctor because it's still just a cold and there is no cure for the common cold, save perhaps one.

So I've got that going for me, which is nice. And grad school starts in a week from tomorrow. First class will be Public Financial Administration. I'm quite concerned, as I was always in the low-track math group.

But we'll see....

Thank God for the DVD

So I put the film United 93 in my Netflix queue a long time ago and eventually it came to my mailbox. I wanted to see this movie, not so much for what happened on the actual flight, for I knew that there was a lot of speculation. Rather I wanted to see the ground side of the drama, between the air traffic controllers and the military.

So I'm watching it now, and I can't get through more than 15-20 minutes at a time. The hijackers haven't even taken the plane, but they are about to. I could hear my heart beating as I watched it. I wonder if this takes something away from the experience. Maybe I should just sit through it and watch the whole thing uninterrupted. I'm not sure I could have stayed in the theater.

I guess I thought that because this wasn't directly about New York City and the Twin Towers that it would be easier to watch. I was wrong. I'm not sure it's a bad thing. I mean I appreciate movies that affect (or effect?) me. This however does more than that. It grabs me and throws me around the room. If I had more than soup today, I'd probably feel a little queasy.

Anyone see it? Am I a coward for not watching it all in one sitting as the Director intended?

Image courtesy of blogs.indiewire.com

New Year's Photos

Here are some photos from New Year's Eve. There was a shindig at my house. Montu had the camera for a little bit, and I tried to erase most of the duplicates. But feel free to take a gander at people getting progressively more drunk.

New Album 1/6/07 11:57 PM

I'm sick....but I'm fighting the good fight

So I took the day off today to fight this cold that is setting up a siege of my body. I feel like I'm in a Western where the good guy and the bad guy are brawling and they both notice the revolver on the floor at the same time. They look at each other and then race for it....

That's me and this cold. I'm playing for keeps. So far, I've had about a gallon of OJ today, some Emergen-C, some Theraflu, some Zicam nasal spray, and a little Tylenol Cold. And I slept all day. Well most of it.

Tonight I viewed Dogs of War. A movie made in the early 80's about mercenaries who stage a coup in an African country. The movie was okay, but was perfect for how I'm feeling. I'm sad to be in bed right now, as Commando is on AMC. And that is an awesome movie. The best part of the movie is by far Christopher Walken. He's got those crazy eyes and he's terrific as a slightly off mercenary. Many thanks to Chuck for the suggestion. This movie must have given him a woody.

I'd post photos, but Blogger is giving me problems....

Oh God.....what have I done

With many thanks to my friends over at Ten Angry Men

So this is amazing....

So I was watching the national news last night and saw the graphic of "Subway Savior" appear above the anchor. I saw a black guy and a weepy white guy and some B-roll of a NYC subway car. So I thought it was a story about how a jaded New Yorker saved the life of some guy by pulling him back from the edge of the tracks. Or he went down on the tracks and helped him up back onto the platform. As a cynical New Yorker, I was non-plussed.

Until I saw the CGI reenactment. Holy Shit. So this kid has a seizure and falls onto the tracks. The train is coming into the station. This guy jumps down onto the tracks and lays on top of him to make sure he doesn't flail or raise his head. The train passes over the top of both of them. You gotta read this story.

I'm not sure I would have done that. The savior was former Navy (not Marine...should have read more closely), and a New Yorker. So the kid who fell was in good hands.

I always knew something was wrong with Elmo

This is creepy. I like how it looks like Elmo tries get up at one point.